All tagged affair recovery
I have often said and will continue to say that no one can make the decision to stay in a relationship after one person has had an affair but the people in the relationship. The choice to stay or go is yours and yours alone. The kids; your mother-in-law; your best friend the manager of the grocery store can all have their opinions but they are meaningless. You and only you - meaning the two people in the relationship need to work this through and wholeheartedly decide what is right for you.
Why do we need to talk about it? This is often said by the one who had the affair…can’t you just forget about it and move on?
There are a couple of perspectives on why you need to talk.
Today I am responding to an excellent question I have recently received because I know most people affected by an affair carry this fear – and it is not just the betrayed spouse. Twice lately I've had some freak out moments. Was out a couple of times over the weekend with someone who doesn’t know about the affair and saw people who looked like the Affair Partner (AP). Sent me into slight panic attacks at the thought of actually bumping into her one day and having no idea how to handle that kind of a situation (one for my own self sanity and two if it was to happen in front of someone who doesn't know what's happened).
It seems like a lifetime ago that I found out about my husband’s affair. Actually it was 5 years ago this week. 5 years that started in intense pain and are now full of much joy. And although there were many times in the early days when it all felt too hard and I wanted to give up, I do not regret a minute of the time that I spent rebuilding my marriage.